The dream is this - that we'll finally be happy when we reach our goals: find the guy, finish our internship, that's the dream. Then we get there. And if we're human, we immediately start dreaming of something else. Because, if this is the dream, then we'd like to wake up. Now, please!

The Other Side of This Life, Part 1 is the twenty-second episode of the third season and the 58th overall episode of Grey's Anatomy.

Short SummaryEdit

Addison leaves for warmer climes and to figure things out, Susan visits the clinic, and Cristina's perfect wedding is changed when her and Burke's mothers hit town.

Full SummaryEdit

Meredith is watching TV early in the morning. Alex and Izzie join her. They all can't sleep but they don't tell each other why.

Cristina wakes up from voices in the living room. She opens the door and finds Burke talking to their mothers. Cristina's mother tells her to stop lurking and say hello to her guests. Cristina does so, and notices the whole apartment is filled with flowers. Cristina asked what they're doing here so early. Jane Burke replies they're not early, they should've been here six months ago. Helen, Cristina's mother, says her daughter doesn't know what it takes to plan a wedding. Burke gives her a mug of coffee and tells her to breathe.

Richard tells Derek the police still hasn't anything on Jane Doe, who's called Ava now, Derek says. Now that the rest of her medical problems are solved, Derek will look if he can do anything about the memory loss. Mark comes over, asking if anyone's seen Addison. She took a leave of absence. Mark doesn't know why. Derek jokingly questions what he did to her. Mark asks where she went, but Richard only knows Addison needed some time to be happy and free. Richard walks away, and so does Derek after giving Mark a meaningful look.

Addison is driving near the coastline, trying to keep her hair out of her face. She managed to do so using her sunglasses.

She parks her car in front of the Oceanside Wellness Group, gets out of her car and checks the address on the paper. She takes a moment to enjoy the sun and takes off her jacket. She goes inside, where she gets on the elevator. A man rushes in. They stand next to each other and Addison starts laughing. She tells him that were she comes from, elevators tend to be this kind of aphrodisiac. Get on, and you get all horny. The man gives her a weird look, so she clarifies she wasn't talking about them. She's just relieved to be on a not-horny elevator. Just get on and ride, without the sex. The man gets off the elevator and turns around, giving her a look before walking off. Addison tells herself she's becoming a crazy, inappropriately chatting freak. "Becoming? Seems like your already there," a voice tells her. Addison looks around, but there's no one.

Callie bumps into Cristina, who weirdly greets her. Callie notices the mothers and asks if someone has bones that need resetting. Cristina then manages to say "bridesmaid". She explains the mothers have been talking on the phone and now they're here. "To plan the wedding," Helen clarifies. Jane says Cristina led them to believe they were friends. Callie laughs at first, but confirms when she sees Cristina's serious face. The mothers smile and Helen starts to measure Callie's body. Callie can't believe Cristina is actually asking her to be a bridesmaid, but Cristina's face tells her she's really desperate.

Meredith walks up to Derek, and after a short conversation about his night, Meredith tells him the drowning was different for her than it was for him. She doesn't know how to explain, but she wants to be better now and she wants to let him in. Derek smilingly asks if she practiced it. With hand gestures, but she left those behind. She's just saying now is not the time to give up on her. He understands.

In L.A., the receptionist of Oceanside Wellness Group answers the phone. As he confirms an appointment, he checks out Naomi, one of the doctors working at the practice. Addison is on the floor too, watching a screen promoting a book. She laughs and walks up to the receptionist. She wants to tell him who she's looking for, but then sees Maya sitting in the waiting room. She can't believe how big Maya's gotten. Then Naomi, Maya's mother, comes over and tells Maya she's gonna be late for school. She then sees Addison, who hugs her. Addison is paying a surprise visit. She tells her she drove all the way to L.A. and had a psychotic breakdown in the elevator. Naomi doesn't seem to excited and tells Maya to get her bag. She asks Addison what she wants. Addison missed her. Naomi finds this difficult to believe, as she hasn't heard anything from Addison for over a year, except for a Christmas card. She tried everything to contact her: she emailed, called her and so on. Addison asks her to let it go, because she's been through a rough time after her divorce. Naomi informs her she got divorced as well. Addison can't believe she and Sam divorced. "Addison!" a man calls. It's Sam, who comes over after kissing Maya goodbye. He hugs Addison, who starts teasing him about his book, Body Language. A woman tells Dell, the receptionist, to push her appointment. She's going to rescue Cooper now. Sam introduces her as Violet, the practice's shrink. Violet walks down the stairs, mumbling she's Cooper's colleague, not his chauffeur. Sam enthusiastically starts talking about the practice, but Naomi asks to excuse them for a minute. She and Addison walk past Pete, the man Addison was in the elevator with. He asks Sam who the hot, possibly insane redhead is. "Don't even think about it," Sam says.

Entering Naomi's office, Addison says she can't believe Naomi is working with her ex-husband in a place where it's all about him. Naomi simply tells her it's a good book and they're still friends. That's healthy, she thinks. Addison asks what happened, but Naomi replies that the time they were close was back in med school, which is a long time ago. Addison says Naomi can't stay mad at her forever, she knows her. Naomi jokingly insults her, with Addison replying she missed her too. Now Naomi wants to know why she's really here. Addison replies Naomi is one of the best fertility specialists. Naomi understand she wants a baby. Addison smiles. She does.

Back in Seattle, Bailey finds Susan in the clinic. Susan has hiccups and acid reflux. The hiccups have stopped earlier, but they seem to be getting worse now. Bailey gives her chlorpromazine, which Susan thinks is a crazy person drug. It is anti-psychotic, but it's also helpful with hiccups and if they don't stop, Susan soon will be a crazy person. Susan asks about Meredith, knowing she's really busy with the intern exam coming up. She tried to call her, but... Bailey doesn't reply, so Susan tells her the hiccups have stopped. Bailey says it's all due to the drug, 

Addison is in the exam room with Naomi, telling her she always wanted a kid but now, she's not getting younger and she's post McDreamy and McSteamy. Naomi doesn't understand the Mc thing, but Addison tells her not to Mc-nickname anything ever again. A baby, that is the answer now. Find a sperm donor and get a baby. Naomi doesn't seem too enthusiastic about Addison's plan. Addison points out she got a baby too, but Naomi replies she did so with a husband. Therefore, Naomi is Addison's example. Naomi lists the tests they're going to do, including an antral follicle count. Addison can't believe she's really going to have a baby.

Sam is examining a patient who has had her fourth sports injury in three months. This time it was on the treadmill. Sam asks “Whats going on?” The patients says she pushed her self to hard. Sam says “No what’s really going on?” The patient goes into a spill about her being a very sexual being but she hasn’t been having sex. Her husband has not had sex with her for 18 months. He just won’t do it. So what does she do she runs, she runs so she won’t sleep with any one else she runs so she wont pick up a tire iron and beat her husband to death. “You’d do it with me right” she asks Sam responds I think you need to spend some time with our therapist.

Coming soon


  • Meredith Grey
  • Cristina Yang
  • Izzie Stevens
  • Alex Karev
  • George O'Malley
  • Miranda Bailey
  • Richard Webber
  • Addison Montgomery
  • Callie Torres
  • Mark Sloan
  • Preston Burke
  • Derek Shepherd
  • Cooper Freedman
  • Violet Turner
  • Pete Wilder
  • Sam Bennett
  • Naomi Bennett
  • William 'Dell' Parker
  • Jane Doe/Ava
  • Thatcher Grey
  • Allan
  • Kathy
  • Paul
  • Carol
  • Helen Rubenstein (left, with Jane Burke)
  • Jim
  • Lisa
  • Rick
  • Doug
  • Cammy
  • Maya Bennett
  • Susan Grey
  • Jane Burke
  • Keith (left, with Rick)
  • Nurse (far left, with Susan Grey and Miranda Bailey)

Main CastEdit

Special Guest StarsEdit

Guest StarsEdit



Medical NotesEdit


  • Diagnosis:
  • Treatment:

Ava still couldn't remember who she was, so Derek agreed to look a little harder now that her other health issues were cleared up.

Susan GreyEdit

  • Diagnosis:
    • Acid reflux
    • Persistent hiccuping
  • Treatment:
    • Chlorpromazine
    • Endoscopic gastroplication

Susan came into the hospital with acid reflux and persistent hiccups. Bailey gave her some chlorpromazine, which stopped the hiccups temporarily. When they came back, Bailey suggested endoscopic gastroplication. She had that procedure and was sent home.

Addison Forbes MontgomeryEdit

  • Diagnosis:
    • Intertility
  • Treatment:

Addison decided she wanted to have a baby, so she had Naomi run tests on her. Her FSH was high and her follicle count was only two, meaning she was functionally infertile.


  • Diagnosis:
    • Knee injury
  • Treatment:

Kathy got a knee injury by falling off a treadmill. It was her fourth sports injury in three months, which raised Sam's suspicions. When she confessed that she and her husband weren't having sex, he referred her to Violet.

Callie's PatientEdit

  • Diagnosis:
    • Torn ACL
  • Treatment:
    • ACL repair

Callie rescheduled an ACL repair in order to go to the bridal shop with Cristina.

Ava's BabyEdit

  • Diagnosis:
  • Doctors:
  • Treatment:

Ava's baby was staying in the hospital with her.


  • Diagnosis:
    • Pregnancy
    • Placenta accreta
  • Treatment:
    • Prenatal care
    • Amniocentesis

Lisa was pregnant. She was supposed to have been a surrogate, but after the implantation, she slept with three other men, leaving the question of if the implantation took or if she got independently pregnant. Seeing that she hadn't had any prenatal care, Addison started that for Lisa. Addison diagnosed Lisa with placenta accreta, which would make delivery dangerous for Lisa.


  • Diagnosis:
    • Anxiety
    • Stress
  • Doctors:
  • Treatment:
    • Valerian root

Doug was seeing Pete for anxiety and stress, for which Pete prescribed valerian root.


  • Diagnosis:
    • Decreased libido
    • Erectile dysfunction
  • Treatment:

After a session with Violet, Paul was told to have sex with his wife, even if he wasn't in the mood. When he had erectile dysfunction, Violet suspected a physical cause and referred him to Sam.


Song Performer Scene
"Sealion" Feist
  • Meredith is watching TV on the couch at 3 AM when she's joined by Izzie and Alex.
  • Cristina wakes up to laughing and goes out of the bedroom to see Burke with both their mothers.
  • They're in town for the wedding planning. Burke tells Cristian to breathe.
"Lost" The Mary Onettes
"Down in the Valley" The Broken West
  • Dell answers the phone at Oceanside as he watches Naomi.
  • Addison laughs at a slideshow of Sam with his book.
  • Addison goes to ask Dell about Naomi, but she sees Maya in the lobby.
  • Naomi is surprised to see Addison.
"Message From Yuz" Switches
  • The doctors at the practice all go to the conference room when they hear yelling.
  • There's an argument over whose baby Lisa was carrying.
"Los Angeles" The Rosewood Thieves
  • Violet tells Paul to have sex with his wife.
  • Pete and Sam walk Thurgood Marshall and talk about Addison.
  • Sam says he's not ready to move on from Naomi.
"California Sun" Jem Griffiths
  • Addison and Naomi talk about Naomi's life.
  • Violet sees Allan at the grocery store. She learns that Allan is married now.
"Not Having It" The Adored
  • Cooper finds his car stripped at a junkyard. He starts crying over the woman who stole it.
"Turpentine" Brandi Carlile
  • Addison says she's going to the beach, but Naomi has her test results.
  • Naomi tells Addison she's basically infertile. Addison is upset by the news.
  • Addison gets on the elevator and yells at the "elevator God" and starts crying.

Notes and TriviaEdit

PROMO 3.22 3

PROMO 3.22 3.23 "The Other Side of This Life"

  • This episode's title originated from the song The Other Side of This Life, originally sung by Jefferson Airplane.
  • This episode scored 21.23 million viewers.
  • This episode is told to be the backdoor pilot for spin-off Private Practice.
  • This episode (and the second part) features a guest appearance by Bellamy Young, who portrays First Lady Mellie Grant in Shonda Rhimes's other TV show Scandal.
  • This is the first episode to feature non-flashback scenes that do not take place in the Seattle area.
  • There was no separate Grey Matter blog post made for this episode, but there is one on the two-part episode.


Episode StillsEdit


Addison: You work with your ex-husband in a shrine for your ex-husband.
Naomi: It's actually a good book. And we're friends. And we stayed friends after we divorced. It's very healthy. We're healthy.
Addison: What happened between you and Sam?
Naomi: Addison – you and I were close in med school, but it was a long time ago.
Addison: Oh, Naomi. Come on, you can't stay mad at me forever. I know you.
Naomi: You got fat.
Addison: I did not!
Naomi: Your hair is hideous.
Addison: It is not!
Naomi: And you're getting really, really ugly.
Addison: Aww. I missed you too.

Callie: Okay. I rescheduled an ACL repair, but I wanna be clear: I will not be wearing pink or baby blue. I do not do flowers in my hair. And I will never be seen with a bow on my ass, okay?
Cristina: See? She's got the right attitude.

(Addison slaps Sam's head)
Sam: Ow!
Addison: Idiot. You divorced Naomi?
Sam: Just mind your own business.
(slaps Sam's head again)
Sam: Ouch!
Addison: Moron. She's my best friend.
Sam: Stop hitting me on top of my head.
Addison: Did you cheat? [goes in to hit Sam again]
Sam: Okay. [catches her hand] Two things I learned back in kindergarten. One – keep your hands to yourself. Two – he who smelt it, dealt it.
Addison: That makes no sense.
Sam: Yeah. Well, you cheated. You cheated on your husband with his best friend. There. Smelt it, dealt it. It works.
Addison: You're using fart logic!
Sam: Hey, you want details, go see Naomi.
Addison: She won't talk about it.
Sam: Ah. Then you get no details.
Addison: I'm on her side, you know that?
Sam: That's why you get no details.
Addison: (puts her fists on the desk) Details!
Sam: Woman, be quiet.
(both grin)
Addison: I missed you.

See AlsoEdit

A complete overview of this episode's crew can be found here.