|I Will Follow You Into the Dark|
|Season 5, episode 17|
|Adele Webber is called in to solve the issues between Richard and Bailey.|
March 12, 2009
- "Every surgeon I know has a shadow. A dark cloud of fear and that follows even the best of us into the OR. We pretend the shadow isn’t there hoping that if we save more lives, master harder techniques, run faster and farther it will get tired and give up the chase but like they say... you can’t outrun your shadow. Every surgeon has a shadow. And the only way to get rid of a shadow is to turn off the lights, to stop running from the darkness and face what you fear, head on."
- —Meredith Grey
After learning at a deposition that more of his patients have died than survived, Derek leaves both the hospital and the house, even as Meredith refuses to give up on him. Meanwhile Bailey and the Chief continue to bicker over her peds fellowship until his wife, Adele, is called in, thoroughly annoyed at the both of them. The interns make a disturbing breakthrough on "Patient X," unaware that the charts they're looking at are actually Izzie's, prompting Izzie to confide in the most unlikely of people.
Derek was "fried," sitting on the couch for three days and eating cereal out of the box. Meredith, Alex, Lexie and Izzie all watched him like he was a zoo animal. Alex was mad that Derek was eating all his cereal, Lexie thought Derek was sitting on her keys, but Izzie sympathized with him, saying he was "taking stock" after a life-altering experience.
Derek finally had to get up to give a deposition about how he killed his patient. At the hospital, Cristina startled Hunt while he was sleeping and he jumped so suddenly that she fell back into a rack of medical supplies and cut her arm.
She tried to make Hunt feel better about it, saying she'd had weird dreams before, too. She tried to tell Meredith she "tripped and fell" and said it was "fine." Hunt, though, said it wasn't fine, and walked away.
Sloan was still upset with Derek for punching him and he didn't want to go back to Derek and ask him for forgiveness. Callie, meanwhile, was worried about where she stood with the ped doctor, Arizona, after she poured her heart out to her at Joe's in front of Arizona's date.
Izzie's interns had some thoughts about "Patient X" (remember, Izzie is Patient X).
A trio of siblings that had the gene for a hereditary form of cancer that gave them a 3-in-4 chance of getting the cancer told Bailey they'd made a pact and decided to have their stomachs cut out to avoid getting the cancer.
A high school marching band member had a seizure on the football field and was brought into the ER. Hunt decided to shock her, which could either kill her or save her.
It worked. When she came to she said, "Oh no! Did it happen again?" She was worried she looked like she "crapped her pants." A couple of her bandmates were annoyed that her seizure ruined their chance at winning the regional championship.
Izzie had all the interns giving their theories on Patient X.
Meredith gave the stomach removal siblings a list of the possible side effects of having their stomachs removed. The 23-year-old brother was worried about the possibilities, including "anal leakage." He said their older sister couldn't continue to run their lives.
The chief was upset that Derek hadn't been around and he had surgeries piling up. Another surgeon, Dr. Nelson, who had never been noticed, volunteered to do one of the surgeries that Derek would have otherwise done. Callie later told Sloan that Nelson was like "the JV to Shepherd's varsity."
Derek sat after a meeting with the lawyers with a stack of two files -- the people he saved and the people he "killed." The second pile was higher. He left the hospital with the chief yelling at him about how he needed to get back to work. Derek left.
Meredith and Cristina commiserated about their guys, with Cristina saying Hunt wouldn't look at her "ever since he was all 'Apocalypse Now' on me this morning."
The chief and Bailey were in surgery, removing a stomach (but we didn't know whose). He was chastising Bailey for wanting to take care of children. Suddenly, there was something Bailey felt.
The interns told Izzie that Patient X was "fine," but this only made her upset. She yelled at them and said, "She's not fine." She told them they were missing something and they had to figure out what it was they were missing.
Trish, the oldest sister, was the one who'd had the operation and they found a tumor. Her little sister, Meg, was upset and told her brother that the reason Trish controlled everything was because she was the only one who could take care of them. This made Meg so upset, she said she wanted to have the surgery immediately.
Alex theorized that the marching band girl had been mistreated for epilepsy when the problem was really in her heart, but Arizona didn't want to shock the girl's seemingly healthy heart. Hunt said it was Alex's call.
George and Izzie had a heart to heart after Cristina made fun of Izzie by saying that she did so little work she was going to be the new George. Izzie said George read more journals and logged more hours in the skills lab than anyone. She said she would be proud to be like him.
Lexie wanted to biopsy Patient X and this made Izzie smile.
The chief got upset with Bailey questioning him in surgery and shouted about how it was his hospital and he wanted people to do what he said.
Alex and Arizona prepped for his suggested test on the marching band girl's heart. Arizona handed him in the paddles and told him to be ready to use it if it was needed. They monitored her heart rhythms and figured out Alex was ready, even though there was a tense moment when he thought he'd have to shock her. Alex was right, but he was very shaken by the experience of having had the girl's life in his hands and on his conscience.
Bailey told the chief it was "not OK" that he yelled at her in surgery and in front of her residents. He walked away without saying anything.
Lexie came to Izzie with their diagnosis. They used the MRIs and biopsy information to figure out that Patient X had a melanoma that spread to her skin, liver and brain. Her prognosis was three months with treatment, "if she was lucky." Then one intern said, "She's pretty much toast." Izzie teared up slightly before telling them they did a good job. The interns asked for a prize and Izzie lambasted them, telling them they shouldn't expect a prize every time they do their jobs and hand someone a death sentence.
Adele showed up at the hospital and pulled the chief and Bailey into a conference room.
The marching band girl was very happy her seizures were over and she had a pacemaker that could be easily hidden. When her bandmates suggested she try out for choir because they didn't get a trophy, Alex told them that she was fixed. He said it was an "epileptic bone." They asked if she was "normal" and Alex said none of them were normal. They were "band nerds."
Adele straightened out the chief and Bailey, telling them they were both being childish. He apologized.
Lexie thanked Izzie for teaching them, saying she learned a lot by diagnosing Patient X. Izzie asked Lexie what she would say to Patient X. Izzie told Lexie what she should say to the patient, telling them that even if a 5 percent survival rate wasn't great -- the Lexie interrupted and said "screw the odds." Izzie told that's exactly what she should say.
Arizona and Hunt told Alex he did good work and he could be the future of the hospital. He ran to Izzie to tell her the good news, and told her she had to "stop wasted time with this Patient X crap" because he wanted her to be with him as the future of the hospital. She kissed him.
Bailey told the chief she thought he was upset that she was doing "something soft." She said he was scared he'd "gone soft." She told him to embrace it.
Cristina told Hunt it was going to take a lot more than a bad dream to scare him off. He said, "It's more than a bad dream." She touched his head and said, "I know."
The chief went to Meredith and asked her to help bring Derek back. She said that sometimes people just want to be left alone. The chief told Meredith that Derek was planning to propose. "That's not a man who wants to be left alone," the chief said.
Lexie went to Sloan and said that maybe they had a 3 percent survival rate. She was worried she broke him. He said, "You're the one who put me back together."
Dr. Nelson asked Sloan if he wanted to get a drink after work. "How about a rain check, John," Sloan said.
"It's Jim," Dr. Nelson said.
Callie and Arizona ran into each other in the elevator. Arizona asked Callie out to dinner. Callie said, "Maybe." Then she said, "How's tomorrow?"
At the end of the night, George told Izzie, "I'm still here. I still care." He knew she didn't want to talk about whatever the problem was. She said, "Not yet."
Izzie went to Cristina to tell her something because she knew Cristina could take it.
Meredith went to the trailer to find Derek. He'd cleaned out his clothes from her closet at her house. She told him he was hiding. She said, "So what, you made a mistake?" She told him not to quit.
He told her she wrote the book on quitting. He told her he was done operating. He kept insulting her -- he was drunk -- and he told her to leave. He yelled at her, saying this was her way out.
She said, "I know there's a ring." She said the chief told her about it.
Derek, who'd been swinging at rocks with a baseball bat, pulled out the ring and said, "Here's your ring."
He tossed it in the air and knocked it into the distance with the bat. He went into the trailer and told Meredith to go away. She said she wasn't giving up, that they were in this together.
Back at the hospital, Cristina and Izzie were in the dreaded vent room, where she told Cristina about her cancer.
Main Cast Edit
- Ellen Pompeo as Dr. Meredith Grey
- Sandra Oh as Dr. Cristina Yang
- Katherine Heigl as Dr. Izzie Stevens
- Justin Chambers as Dr. Alex Karev
- T.R. Knight as Dr. George O'Malley
- Chandra Wilson as Dr. Miranda Bailey
- James Pickens, Jr. as Dr. Richard Webber
- Sara Ramírez as Dr. Callie Torres
- Eric Dane as Dr. Mark Sloan
- Chyler Leigh as Dr. Lexie Grey
- Kevin McKidd as Dr. Owen Hunt
- Patrick Dempsey as Dr. Derek Shepherd
Guest Stars Edit
- Jessica Capshaw as Dr. Arizona Robbins
- Michael Rady as Mike Shelley
- Wendy Hoopes as Tricia
- Erin Cahill as Meg
- Susane E. Lee as Beth
- Brandon Scott as Dr. Ryan Spalding
- Loretta Devine as Adele Webber
- Phil Abrams as Dr. Jim Nelson
- B.K. Cannon as Girl Band Geek
- Marcus McGee as Boy Band Geek
- Mark Saul as Intern Steve
- Gloria Garayua as Intern Graciella
- Candice Afia as Intern Laura
- Amrapali Ambegaokar as Intern Dani
- Tymberlee Chanel as Intern Claire
- Molly Kidder as Intern Megan
- Winston Story as Intern Leo
- Joseph Williamson as Intern Pierce
- Nicole Cummins as Paramedic
|"A Storm Is Going to Come"||Piers Faccini||
Notes and Trivia Edit
- This episode's title originated from the song, I Will Follow You into the Dark, which was originally sung by Death Cab for Cutie.
- This episode scored 13.54 million viewers.
- Owen: (to Alex) You did a hell of a job today. The Chief is gonna hear about it.
- Arizona: Pretty impressive for a resident. You fix that attitude of yours, you could be the future of this hospital. The one to watch. You go , Karev!
- Meredith: How'd it go with the lawyers?
- Derek: They told me my death rate. (looks at small pile of files) These are the people I saved. (looks at big pile of files) These are the people I killed.
- Meredith: Okay. Well most of those people were terminal when they came to you. You were their last chance, and you take on impossible cases. Look at the clinical trial.
- Derek: It's just so many people. More than Dahmer, Mason, and Bundy combined.
- Meredith: You're not looking at the big picture.
- Derek: (points to the big stack of files) This is the big picture.
- Richard: Where the hell is Shepherd?!
- Mark: Uh, you can't rely on Shepherd, sir, is there anything that I can do?
- Richard: Well, my neuro surgeon's been missing for days, I still have no head of cardio, I've got general surgeons quitting on me left and right, surgeries piling up on me like dead fish, and no surgeons to do 'em.
- Mark: Well, now would probably be a bad time to that my hand is still out of commission and I can't operate. ... You know what? Leave me on the board Chief, and I won't let you down.
- Jim Nelson: I could do that craminotomy, Chief.
- Richard: Uh, put Dr. Nelson on the cramiotomy. Apperciate it John. (walks off)
- Jim Nelson: It.. It's Jim.
- Mark: You must be new. Welcome to Seattle Grace.
- Jim Nelson: I've been here for ten years. I was the interm Chief of Neuro until Shepherd and his red cape swooped in from New York.
- Mark: Mark Sloan, Plastics.
- Jim Nelson: We've met... three times.
- Lexie: Yes, the odds are against us. I'm a one woman wrecking ball, all I do is break you. Your hand, your penis, your relationships, your life. I'd say our survival rate is about 3%. And that's...that's, that's bad. But, it's not nothing. And I don't think we should give up on this. At least not yet because... (Mark puts a finger to her lips to stop her) Okay.
- Mark: You think you broke me, Little Grey? ... You're the one that put me back together. (Lexie smiles)
- Lexie: I learned a lot today. Diagnosing a patient from beginning to end. So, thank you for teaching us.
- Izzie: What would you say? To patient X. How would you... How would you break the news?
- Lexie: Um, I would say that I was very sorry, and that there were support groups. Th... I ... I don't know. What do you say to somebody whose, whose gonna...
- Izzie: You say, they have a choice. They can runaway and hide from it, or they can face it. You say they need to be around the people who love them, because it's gonna be the toughest fight of their life, and no one should have to do it alone. And then you give them the odds. And even though a 5% survival rate is bad, it's really bad. You say.... you say....
- Lexie: Screw the odds! People die of the hiccups. My mother died of the hiccups. Survival rate for that is what... 100 percent? The odds are that she should be alive right now. The odds are... The odds mean crap! So people should face it and they should fight. ... Maybe not those words.
- Izzie: No. Exactly those words. Thank you Dr. Grey.
- Meredith: (about Derek) And he just walked out. Without saying a word, he just walked out!
- Cristina: Hunt won't even look at me, since he went all "Apocalypse Now" on me this morning.
- Meredith: He had to get all scalpel happy up in that patients brain, and now he can't face it!
- Cristina: He thinks I'm what? This wilting flower? Well guess what, I'm the strong one.
- Meredith: Oh my god! I'm the strong one.
- Cristina: You see, if I had that stomach cancer gene, I would get that gastrorectomy no problem. I face things, I don't walk away.
- Meredith: Derek walks away. Maybe walking away is the answer?
- Cristina: See it's not emotional, it's science. You have a problem, don't ignore it.
- Meredith: Well, sometimes if you have to pee and you ignore it, it does go away.
- Izzie: (laughs) You guys are hilarious! I mean do you even know what she just said? Or what she just said? (Meredith and Cristina look at each other) I can totally see you guys in 50 years, at a nursing home, just talking at each other with your hearing aids off. (laughs) Hi-larious! Ah, I love lunch.
- Richard: You told Adele on me?
- Bailey: You stopped speaking to me, sir. That didn't exactly leave me many options. I'd like to know if you'd have reacted like this if I left general surgery for neuro or cardio?
- Richard: I don't follow.
- Bailey: Or is it because you regard peds as a soft specality? Is that what's bothering you?
- Richard: Oh, that's ridiculous.
- Bailey: Well, maybe, but it seems to me that every time I do something that you perceive as soft, like havin' a baby, takin' some time off to see my baby, specializing in babies, I'm dead to you. You wanna know what I think, sir?
- Richard: Not particularly.
- Bailey: I think that you're scared that you've gone soft. You blame this whole hospital's decline on it. And you wanna know what I think about that?
- Richard: You're gonna tell me anyway.
- Bailey: It's not doin' one bit of good. I mean, surgeons are still droppin' like dominoes around here. So, maybe it's time that you got in touch with your femnine side. Maybe you need a little soft.
- Richard: ... You still shouldn't have ratted me out.
- Bailey: Sorry.
- Richard: Me, too.
|Grey's Anatomy Season 5|
|#01||"Dream a Little Dream of Me, Part 1"||#09||"In the Midnight Hour"||#17||"I Will Follow You Into the Dark"|
|#02||"Dream a Little Dream of Me, Part 2"||#10||"All By Myself"||#18||"Stand By Me"|
|#03||"Here Comes the Flood"||#11||"Wish You Were Here"||#19||"Elevator Love Letter"|
|#04||"Brave New World"||#12||"Sympathy for the Devil"||#20||"Sweet Surrender"|
|#05||"There's No 'I' in Team"||#13||"Stairway to Heaven"||#21||"No Good at Saying Sorry (One More Chance)"|
|#06||"Life During Wartime"||#14||"Beat Your Heart Out"||#22||"What a Difference a Day Makes"|
|#07||"Rise Up”"||#15||"Before and After"||#23||"Here's to Future Days"|
|#08||"These Ties That Bind"||#16||"An Honest Mistake"||#24||"Now or Never"|
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